We need to Talk...

Today we're going to have a quick cultural miscommunication lesson. Back when I first started dating my wife she sometimes emailed me the sentence "We need to talk" this always filled me with dread and caused me a lot of stress...

...do you know why? In English, when someone says "We need to talk" it is 95% of the time followed by BAD NEWS! So these words are REALLY strong in English and shouldn't normally be used.

For example:

Boss: John come into my office we need to talk.

John: Did I do something wrong? Am I getting fired???

Boss: No, no but you are getting transferred to our Arkansas office.

John: Arkansas... uh... OK...

The most common usage of this phrase you'll see in movies or TV shows is before someone breaks up with someone. In most cases when your boyfriend/girlfriend says this your partner thinks you will break up with them~!

Jill: John about your transfer to Arkansas...

John: Yeah, Jill?

Jill: We need to talk... I can't do a long distance relationship...

John: What? Are you breaking up with me??!?!

Jill: Sorry but long distance relationships never work out.

John: This week sucks!

So PLEASE don't use the phrase "We need to talk" lightly, instead try to say what you want directly or use the weaker"I have to tell you something" BUT remember try and be SPECIFIC.

"I have to tell you something" could also make people feel bad news is coming. If you say "I have to tell you something about my job" or "I have to tell you about my new hobby" then people won't feel any worry.

Ed: Hey Tina, I have to tell you about something. Do you have a minute?

Tina: Sure, what's up?

Ed: I'm gonna open up my own coffee shop.

Tina: Cool~!

Have a nice weekend,

Phil